Life Lessons from Ignatius J. Reilly
Posted by elena | Posted in Literary musings, Reviews | Posted on 16-08-2009
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After carefully pacing myself, I finished reading John Kennedy Toole’s only literary offering to the world, A Confederacy of Dunces. I laughed so hard people on the buses gave me funny looks. Having gone from a continually rejected manuscript to being published as a Penguin Classic, it’s difficult for me to find the words to express everything I loved about this book, without repeating more articulate reviewers before me.
Therefore, indulge yourself in the following list of life lessons inspired by the green hunter cap wearing, moustachioed intellectual, Mr. Ignatius J. Reilly:
1. University is the key to exposing the failings of the modern world: Stay in tertiary education as long as you can: complete your Honours and your Masters, and sponge off your single parent.
2. Spend your time exercising your vast vocabulary through letter-writing. You don’t even need to sign your own name to these letters, as your expansive intellect would defend you from any potential lawsuits.
3. Birds should never, under ANY circumstance, form part of an exotic dancer’s routine. EVER.
4. Working for a pants manufacturer is too stressful for the valve and can cause unnecessary flatulence.
5. In most cases, the best way to make your point known to someone is to bellow, holler or thunder at them.
6. Even the most disgraced undercover policeman can rise from his tattered career, with the help of a pornography ring, a spunky prostitute and a trio of violent femmes.
7. Bowling is the sport of harlots.
8. Employment is a superfluous burden that stands in the way of the path to true intellectual and ideological enlightenment.
9. There is nothing suggestive about wheeling a hotdog vendor around town, donning an earring and brandishing a cutlass.
And finally, straight from the mouth of the ginormous, pompous ass himself,
10. Idolise comic book superheroes:
“You must begin a reading program immediately so that you may understand the crises of our age. I recommend Batman especially, for he tends to transcend the abysmal society in which he’s found himself. His morality is rather rigid, also. I rather respect Batman.”
Please feel free to share any life lessons you may have learned from reading A Confederacy of Dunces.
I’ve had Confederacy of Dunces on my TBR for ages. Almost picked up a copy t’other day, but opted for What Was Lost instead. In retrospect, I regret that.
Oh well – it looks like one I’ll need to bump up my TBR again. Even the review made me laugh out loud.
@Uncertainprinciples: Well on the plus side, you still get to experience reading it for the first time. I think this is a book I’ll come back to regularly but nothing beats that first-time read.
Yes!! This book is so amazing.
“7. Bowling is the sport of harlots.”
He’s too funny.
@Estelle: Yes, far too funny. As they said on The First Tuesday Book Club the other day, he’s the character you love to hate (although I couldn’t hate someone who made me laugh like he did).
This is a book I’ve been meaning to read, one that I thought about taking when I went to New Orleans but didn’t feel like going out to buy at the time. I love the list format. And ever since I’ve been reading Jonathan Ames, I’ve had an extreme interest in reading comedic novels. This one sounds like a keeper.
@Salvatore: Jonathan Ames books are really hard to find in Australia, apparently. I read Wake Up, Sir! a while ago but couldn’t get through it because it felt like blasphemy against my beloved Jeeves haha! What titles would you recommend?
I really want to read this…must get it soon!
@J.T. Oldfield: It’s one of those books that tends to sit on people’s TBR lists because it’s such a classic. I wouldn’t have read it this soon, except for someone highly recommending it personally.